Sunday, September 1, 2013

"Abortion is murder too" (Or, Shit Fundamentalists Say)

I'm throwing some pictures in this post too
 in order show them off  and make the
 formatting nicer.  I'm not sure if that makes sense
 at all, but you're going to have to deal with it,
 this shit's a work in progress
Other than daily chores, one of the main tasks I've been assigned involves proof-reading the recently translated English curriculum for Rancho's Evangelical Bible School.  Technically this job is right up my alley.  I read and write English fairly well (I should anyway, I have a Bachelor's degree in the subject) and I went to an evangelical college and have a minor in Religious Studies after having taken numerous courses studying the Bible and the Christian faith from an evangelical perspective.

There's just one problem:  I'm an unabashed Atheist.

Now I'm not writing this post to hate on Rancho.  They're just a bunch of people trying their best and, for the most part, doing a pretty good thing in an otherwise senseless and cruel world.  As people, I sense they probably 
couldn't give a shit what kind of doctrines they subscribed to as long as they could have their charismatic services, deistic insurances, and the feeling that they're making a difference in the world. I'm all for helping poor people, higher purposes and feeling good about yourself.
The intention of this blog is to hate on whoever the fuck wrote the ignorant, bigoted, racist, sexist, dogmatic horsehit with which Rancho intends to brainwash their impressionable young Bible students.  Below are just a few examples in the very first few books that I've copied down from the texts. This is honestly not even the a fraction of the senseless shit I've been sifting through. They are (badly) translated from a Spanish Pentecostal textbook (not by me).

"Many scientists agree that evolution does not make sense."

"The theory of evolution remains an unproven theory and Science is constantly changing. What was once a few years ago understand to be unavoidable truth, is today disputable. On the otherhand, God established a simple and non-scientific language so that man in the days of Moses could understand the world. In spite of everything, we can trust the Bible more than science, since it is the eternal and sovereign Word of God."

"The similarity of DNA between man and monkey can be explained by the fact that both were created from the dust of the Earth."

"Noah's ark measured 135m x 22.5m x 13.5m. Though some express doubts that Noah could fit all the world's animals on a boat with these dimensions, it is important to remember that in these days measurements were taken from the elbow. A really long elbow could be up to 14 inches! Also think that Noah would have taken only baby animals and God would likely have put them into hibernation so they did not need to eat."

I know, I shoot a lot of sunsets.
There's really not much else to look at
 around here.
"[Because they ate the forbidden fruit] Woman would suffer the pains of childbirth and her husband would be her authority. This last part is not bad, because in the home it should be an order, but the fallen man would abuse his authority. Besides women in the same state probably she would rebel."

"From his union with Hagar Ishmael was born, from whom Arabs were born, a people extremely bloody and against the Jews and Christians since their Muslim Religion encourages them so."

"We see in Lv. 18:22 that the practice of homosexuality was banned completely because it destroys the body and mind of man, nevertheless the will of the men of Sodom was to rape the two angels."

If you believe any of the above are reasonable things to teach young people, please stop reading this blog and go baptize yourself in the Jordan Seven times, and if you didn't get taken out by a drone or chemical weapons, see if riding a donkey to Damascus does the trick.

One of my new roomate is 32 years old
 and still sleeps with his stuffed tiger.
  How awesome is that?
Obviously I have deep seated issues with Religion.  They come mostly from having to claw my way out of that nauseating pit of ignorance one step of logic at a time.  Sometimes I feel like Jim Carrey in the Truman Show. Except instead of stepping out of a television set, I'm discovering I spent the majority of my young life being raised by a twisted cult and now I'm 22 years behind in my quest to truly understand how the world works.

Sorry, I got carried away.  The point is what do I do?  Do I do the task I've been assigned and effectively participate in the same brainwashing process I spent the better part of my life overcoming? Or do I find some way to be a force for good in all of this?  

If it sounds like I'm being melodramatic  it's probably because I'm trying to justify the fact that I already ended up deciding to sabotage the textbooks and I feel still feel kind of guilty about it.  

I basically reworked the sentences so that anyone with a speck of intelligence reading them would have no choice but to conclude the authors of the textbooks were mentally deficient and could not be trusted to convey truth in any form.  Admittedly it was immature and probably completely futile, but..

Whatever, YOLO!